Eww... Candy Corn

Seriously. Eww. I mean, the mere thought of getting candy corn in or around my mouth gives me the heebie jeebies.


Vurp....

It's the kind of thing I imagine they feed torture victims so that they die a slow and painful nutrient-free death. The only redeeming quality (if you can call it that) is the "cute" and "festive" autumnal color palette.

Hold on, I got one for you. Let's say you switch out the orange food coloring for gray... BAM! You've got a lean-mean-torture-machine on your hands just like that.




What the hell is it anyway?

HowStuffWorks says:

It's considered a "mellow cream," a name for a type of candy made from corn syrup and sugar that has a marshmallow-like flavor. Although candy corn tastes rich, it's actually fat-free... the recipe for candy corn hasn't changed much since the late 1800s...

Uncle Jimmy says:

Really? I'm shocked (said in my extremely sarcastic voice since it tastes EXACTLY like the recipe hasn't changed since the 1800s).


Who the hell eats it anyway?

I don't know but
Wikipedia says:

The National Confectioners Association estimate 20 million pounds of candy corn are sold each year. October 30 is National Candy Corn Day.

Uncle Jimmy says:

There is a "National Candy Corn Day"?..... Really?
Wow.

Oh, and 20 million pounds of candy corn in a year!?!?!? My guess is that a large chunk of that is going to the mid-section of our country (pun intended) where they make things like this:


and this:

Shudder...

Shockingly, if you'd like to learn more it looks like there is actually an entire piece written on the subject, History of candy corn. With new colors and flavors, a treat for all seasons by Natalie Saeger.

Eww.